17 January, 2013

Les Miserables

A fellow blogger, sent me a following mail after reading my previous blog post.

Hi Kiran,

The people who are trying to poke nose are simply JEALOUS. They cannot compete with you or can be as good as you are. On the same time they cannot accept the fact you are far superior to them because of your hard work, persistence, talent and tremendous amount of effort you put behind your work.

These kind of people bother me a lot. Ignoring is an option but easier said than done. 
Now my views about such people and many others who are constantly JEALOUS.

My blog represents just one side of me. What you read and see is one vivacious person, full of life, full of herself, strong, independent, ambitious, shopaholic, etc etc. In your eyes, life seems to be a bed of roses for her. She gets what she wants, has no struggles, no worries, etc. Now some of you (specially ones, who also know me in real life), wonder- HOW? And some of you, not just wonder but try to seek an element of pain, sorrow, grief, torment etc. in my real life. When you cannot get what your heart desires, you try to create it for me. Because, as I said earlier, it is very difficult for you to accept a person like me. Probably that is why, elders keep talking about "nazar lag jaati hai" (evil eye).

You would be more gratified, if I post my picture where I am sad, am crying, have tears in my eyes, am seeking help, am helpless. You need an object, whom/which you can pity. That would probably satisfy your ego more. Because specially men, (and the ones, who personally know me in real life and are themselves pitiable), get intimidated and threatened by a persona like me.

Now I have two choices:
A. To satisfy your ego.
B. Continue to live my life, my way, fully- without caring about you.

So obviously I choose to do latter and you choose to continue to create obstacles in my life.
In movie, Les Miserables, men continued to oppress a woman and kill her soul.
Should I learn a lesson from that movie? 
Should I act demure, miserable, martyr, a woman who has no mind of her own or is even afraid to speak her mind, is nervous, expects to be taken care of?
Or should I lead life the way I want to- on my own terms?
Daniel taught me something really nice. I guess I will apply that.

My first lesson of Tango with Daniel began with Daniel showing me the above Tango painting. He asked me to assess it and tell what I saw in the picture.
Sigfredo Pastor was a famous Tango painter. In the picture above, one thing that the painter got right was the expression and the mood.
The man- He thinks he is the master of the universe. He walks forward and says, "Charge".
The woman, she is very sure of herself. She is 100% complete within herself. She is not looking for his lead. She does exactly what she wants, when she wants. But she has been taught a secret by her Grandma, "He cannot know".

No other song of the world sings to the misfortune of the impossible love in the way that the Tango does. Tango created a word that is exclusive and has not equal in Spanish: "metejón", this word as Discepolo sings, means to surround oneself with the thing that could not be, to love the suffer of love, to remember, to be homesick, to believe that all the past was better, to feel, to think, to meditate in what is unrecoverable.